Noisy neighbours: do you play your audio system too loud?

May 14th, 2013

Audio TV, Audio & Electronics

Living in an apartment-block requires a bit of tolerance, understanding and respect for your fellow man (and woman).

There’s a lot of you crammed into the one building. And there’s just a few centimetres of plasterboard between the random shlubs above, below and next to you.

Okay, so there’s a bunch of things we could say on the subject of apartment etiquette. Today, we’re gonna focus on the thorny subject of noise – specifically that made by sound-systems (often with subwoofers).

Of which we sell a number of (awesome) examples. So, you know, we feel kinda responsible.

Five (non-preachy) points we want to make about apartment noise that might save a lot of pain and anguish.

Here we go: our little guide to not being that guy. You know, the one other people want to stab in the eye. Feel free to comment, agree or tell us we’re ranting morons.

(Oh – and think we’re being epic kill-joys? Cranky old dudes? Well, imagine trying to get your young child to sleep while some bozo in the hovel next door is getting off on the joy of Cradle of Filth.  Or whatta-bout that poor schmuck who has to drag his sleep-deprived carcass off to work early the next day while you’re just getting down to taking your party-weary body off to bed? Thanks, frat-boy!)

• 1. Remember there are time restrictions …

… the kind when noise from residential premises should not be heard inside a neighbour’s residence.

They vary a bit from state-to-state. In NSW, prohibitions exist from Midnight to 8am on Friday, Saturday or any day preceding a public holiday – and 10pm to 8am on any other day.

In Victoria – weekday curfews exist prior to 7am and after 10pm, except for Friday when the cut-off is 11pm. Saturday and public holidays – you gotta have that thing turned down before 9am and after 11pm – and Sunday it’s before 9am and after 10pm.

The info pertaining to your particular state/territory is readily available online (check ’em out for yourself, ‘cos the subject is pretty boring and we want to move on).

(… Oh and in case you’re interested – while you’re doing so, you may wanna check out all the other sound-restrictions … some of ’em pertaining to stuff we sell, chiefly vacuum cleaners and air-conditioning units.)

• 2. Play nice –

…let people know if you’re going to have a big night.

If you need to turn it up full blast for the sake of a party on a Saturday night – let the poor shlubs around you know you are about to do so. Warn ‘em. Better yet, invite them to the party!

• 3. Put on some headphones…

… if the silence is too much to bear.

You’ll find an awesome selection of these amazing new inventions at Appliances Online.

• 4. Think about noise insulation.

If you’ve got bare floor-boards and you also dig thumping bass, think about investing in some carpet. And while you’re about it, maybe you could grab some drapes to go with it. And some mattresses you can lean against the wall.

Sure, it’ll kinda make you look like you’ve borrowed interior design tips from an insane asylum – but you won’t be driving anyone else crazy.

• 5. Turn down the bass – or turn off your subwoofer altogether.

Especially if you have bare floor-boards. A lot of the time it’s the bass rumble going through your neighbour’s headspace that’s making them so nutso.

In fact, many people might argue there’s no place for a subwoofer in an apartment building…

Why other people may be constantly cranking the music up way too loud …

Hey, maybe you’re the victim in all this and can’t figure out why you’re the poor dude forced to put up with the decibels on a daily basis. Here are a few suggested reasons why this could be happening … which might help you find a resolution.

• They don’t know how loud they are:

Some people can plead ignorance. They aren’t actually douches. Maybe they just haven’t had any points of reference – as in, nobody else in the block plays their music at all. Or, hey, maybe after years of abusing their hearing they’ve gone deaf. They don’t know how the sound of their subwoofer is making the furniture move around your flat.

… Who’d have thunk it?

You should be able to get a sense of their relative jerkiness (or lack there off) those times when you meet them in the hallway or when you’re putting the washing out on the line. Nod and greet you? Ask you how things are going? Yeah, they’re okay … they should be reasonable about the situation.

• They’re off their faces and have lost all sense of reality:

“Whoops – I just drank a whole bottle of rum and ingested some potent substance in a pill-shaped form (not Panadol) and now I feel the urge to crank up Metallica’s Black Album to such a level the sound waves will scour the eyebrows off my face.”

You can generally tell when this is happening. The sound of clinking glass bottles is a bit of a giveaway. As is the dull thumping noise they make when they fall unconscious to the floor.

• They might be trying to drown out the noise of someone else:

They may well be being resorting to this in order to cover up the sound of some other douche. Which may not even be sound that’s related to an audio appliance … we don’t wanna go all coy here, but it might be something to do with people, you know *giggle*, “having relations”.

• They’re jerks:

Probably the most common reason for doing this. The hour of the day is, of course, a giveaway. These people will just as happily turn the dial all the way to 11 in the early hours of Sunday as they will Monday night at 1am? Epic. They’ll also distinguish themselves with the kind of music they listen to. Dubstep? Right. Nickelback? ‘Natch. Mumford and Sons? Jerks.

What to do about the noise – aka how to confront your neighbour

Okay, so we’re going to be all nice about this (at least initially) and say the best way to get a satisfactory outcome from this is to try and approach the offender directly.

Knock on their door. Facing up to them might feel like you’re about to have a tête-à-tête with a serial killer – but remember what we said: they may well have no idea they’re annoying you.

On the other hand, if they are jerks who know damn well what they’re doing, then at least you’ve shown them you won’t be messed around. That might take ’em out of their complacent jerkiness, right?

A passive-aggressive note or thumping on the walls may do the trick on a rare occasion … but we reckon you should just man (or woman) up and talk to them.

Be calm. Walk tall. Deep breaths. Bring drinks.

• If they just won’t listen (and you can still hear them and it’s driving you nuts)

Okay, so that didn’t work. They’re unreasonable. They’re argumentative. They’re unconscious.

Call in the cops or the council. If they’re sympathetic to your case, then they’ll be able to impose a direction preventing the douches from making any more unreasonable noise. Well, for a bit (up to 72 hours). They’ll be fined if they don’t comply.

• If that doesn’t work

Retaliation, dude. Crank it up in return. Sure it’s childish, counter-productive, and two wrongs don’t make a right and all that… but it’ll give you more than a little perverse satisfaction.

And dammit at least you’ll be able to listen to your own music.